Not so Prince Charming?

The prospect of meeting someone new is always exciting as you don’t know where it could lead to. Could this person be the one, your ‘Prince Charming’? As a female, you have the vision of being wooed and romanced by your date. You imagine they would plan a fun and thoughtful date, maybe even buy you flowers. So what do you do when your date is super laid-back?

Not everyone is a romantic or into the whole ‘dating’ scene. Some guys are very casual about dating, or are they just playing it cool? Sometimes it can be hard to differentiate between the two.

This blog is written from my own personal experience, and although every dating experience is unique, you may be able to relate to some of the points mentioned.

So, you’ve been speaking to a guy for a week or two over social media and quite like their personality and your conversations seem to flow nicely. After a few days of speaking they ask if you would like to meet, ‘grab a coffee’. Although you have been speaking for almost two weeks now and have agreed to meet, they still haven’t asked for your number, strange right? Or is it? Are you overthinking this? Perhaps you need to be more chilled out and see it from a casual perspective like they evidently are.

Rightly so, you start to analyse the whole situation. Maybe they just want to be friends? Perhaps they aren’t even interested in you and just want some ‘fun’? Maybe they’re already seeing someone else and that’s why they don’t want you to have their number? Numerous possibilities run through your mind.

It comes to a point where you start to reflect on your own attitude and behaviour towards the situation, perhaps you’re the reason they’re being so casual about this ‘date’ if you can even call it that. Maybe you’re being a little standoffish, or not investing enough time in getting to know them. Are you unapproachable, or even intimidating? Fact is you’re not going to know without asking them, and of course that’s not even an option, so is there any point in dwelling on it? The answer is no, just go with the flow and see where it goes and where this experience takes you.

Being casual about meeting may be a good thing, what’s wrong with meeting first to get to know each other a little better before labelling it a date? Truth is, if they were too full on and too eager to take you on dates, you would be put off and probably complain about that too!

Men and women think in completely different ways, after all men are from Mars and women are from Venus as they say. It can be difficult not to overanalyse situations at times, especially when it comes to dating and someone’s interest in you.

Your prospective date could be in a completely different place in their life in comparison to yourself, so it’s essential you’re understanding and don’t jump to the conclusion that it must be your fault. Give them a chance, see how it progresses, you have nothing to lose! Stay positive and what ever happens it will be a learning curve and hopefully make you wiser in your future dating adventures! Good luck!

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britishbindi

An Award-Nominated blog which discusses what it's like to be a contemporary British Asian Woman. ‍

2 thoughts on “Not so Prince Charming?

  1. Excellent advice!

    Men get nervous too. They might cover it up with outward appearances of coolness and dressing sharply but the nerves are still there in most. I personally would be a little wary of a man who was completely confident…how many times has he done this?

    Online dating is a great way of broadening your choices but my advice, having done it myself (yep, even at my age!), is to give any man you feel you might be compatible with a chance. If he is nervous too then give him a second chance. You might be passing over someone who could rock your world 🙂

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    1. Thank you so much for giving the post a read and feedback! Of course men get nervous too and they all handle it in different ways! Very true – not enough confidence isn’t the most attractive but then neither is too much confidence!

      Totally agree, online dating is a great way to gain experience in meeting new people and to build confidence. Always give a decent guy a chance – even if it doesn’t work out you’re not any worse off 😊

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