Social media is the most popular and fastest growing trend of today, and it’s also the biggest illusion. The majority of us can put our hands up and admit to keeping up with Kardashians and swiping through what we perceive as a picture perfect life. However, many of us are guilty of this when it comes to relationships too.
We look up to these cute couples with envy. The ones that post cute anniversary collages and the thoughtful gift pics, decorated with poetic captions, expressing their undying love for their other half. We look, we double tap, and we compare our relationship to theirs. Why doesn’t my partner write sweet captions about me? Why doesn’t my partner’s Instagram feed look like a diary of our relationship? These are just some of the questions you may ask yourself. BUT DON’T BE FOOLED. Every single relationship has their pits and their peaks and if someone’s telling you different, then they’re lying (or they’ve clearly never been in a relationship).
Nobody publicly shares the bad times (unless they’re one of those attention seeking people, we all know a few), everybody aims to showcase the best parts of their life. Nobody’s going to post a bad selfie are they? It’s the same with relationships, so there’s no reason to compare yours to these so-called ‘perfect’ couples, because in reality, they don’t exist. Every relationship is unique and you should celebrate that, not want to change it to reflect something that it’s not!
The Easy Distraction
When you’re going through a rocky patch, it’s easy to find solace in something false. Being on social media, you’re extremely exposed and it takes little effort for a person to slide into your DM’s and make an attempt to grab your attention and give you a false sense of appreciation; appreciation that you might not be getting elsewhere. With ‘casual’ dating apps such as Tinder, it’s super easy to find a quick fix for attention and completely clouding your judgment in a moment of anguish. But don’t be tempted, a relationship is something you work hard at, and it doesn’t make sense to throw it all away for something so meaningless.
Don’t think you’re a jealous person? Being in a relationship can really test this, especially when you witness your other half showing ‘interest’ in other men and women.
With so many filtered appearances online, it’s hard not to envy these seemingly flawless, glamorous people. Perhaps you’re having a fat week and you see your partner ‘like’ a picture of a gym-honed goddess, you’re not going to feel great about yourself and probably not so great towards your partner – this may spark jealousy! Perhaps you’ve ‘liked’ a picture of a person your partner deems better looking, richer, more intelligent, has a flashier car – the list is endless!
Jealousy also comes into play when those slippery suckers end up in your DM’s. I personally prefer to ignore DM’s but I’ve heard many times “why don’t you tell them to leave you alone” or “tell them you’re in a relationship”. The thing with social media is; you’re exposed and vulnerable to these sorts of situations and you and your partner may not see eye to eye when it comes to handling the situation.
Unfortunately, the illusion of choice has become the downfall of our generation. We can get so caught up in other people’s lives online, that we neglect our reality. Undoubtedly, social media is a great platform to keep in touch with loved ones and share milestones, but it can also be a farce and an illusion, so never compare any aspect of your life to what you see online.
3 thoughts on “Is Social Media the biggest relationship killer?”
Sanju prime example.
For many, flirting or cheating with someone online is easier than irl as you avoid many of the social challenges people, but at the same time because we’re glued to our screens some people lack basic verbal communications and how to interpret body language which is vital. As much as social networking sites have changed how people date or live in relationships, ask yourself, would you date someone who did not have instagram, twitter, snapchat etc?
Working in cyber security I’ve seen how how use of digital devices have changed how generations flirt, date, present themselves, and communicate.
It’s a great article and I look forward to reading future article on online relationships and perceptions in the virtual age.
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